I would quite happily forget my birthday and pretend it doesn’t happen and hasn’t happened for many a year - I already forget what my age is so I guess the next step is forgetting the entire date. Look forward to that one! But people just won’t let you.
So when it was that time of the year again at the weekend, I was very very pleased that it was on a day when I had already been invited to someone else’s party, so when people asked I was able to say that yes I was going out on my birthday - but quite happily not to a party thrown for me or by me – just turn up and be a guest at someone else’s do. And very enjoyable it was too. I think one of my worst horrors would be anyone ever arranging any kind of ‘surprise’ parties – surprises like that are the stuff of nightmares and Cilla Black…
But I have had to accept the fact that I will now have to put 'age 38' on forms – well, if I can remember how old I am – and I am indeed moving ever closer to that over 40s category. Bugger, do i have to change the intro to this blog too?
To test out the spirit of maturity and sensibleness that presumably must now come with my increasingly old age, I thought I’d have a look back and reflect on the past year and think about what I want to do over the next 12 months – which I know will, like the last, fly by whatever happens – that's an age thing as well. If nothing else birthdays seem an apt time to make resolutions - better than those that everyone makes at New Year then finds January so depressing they have to turn to cigarettes/ alcohol/ chocolate etc.
So things I am pleased I have done in the last year – I have:
Finished – and successfully passed – an MA (and must remember though I love learning things... never again !!)
Stopped smoking – properly as opposed to the just-maybe-having-well-ok-one or- two-wont-really-count type stopping
Got fitter and healthier – although not yet marathon woman type fitness – I have lost weight which took me by surprise, I do some – albeit at the moment ‘gentle’ – exercise regularly, I think i eat much healthier – I think recent nagging from the chiropractor helped – and even have less wine without too much trauma.
Rediscovered the joys of horse riding – after a good 20 years or so out of the saddle
Got the upstairs of the house done up and redecorated – except the bathroom but that will need serious surgery some time in the future and will do for now
Been to 2 new places I’d never been to before – Paris and Belfast, both fab in very different ways.
All in all not a bad year then, had lots of fun and enjoyable stuff… so what about the next 12 months..
What do I want to do?
The most challenging – bollox I’ll just say difficult/ terrifying/ hugely risky thing – will be leaving my job. Having decided that I don’t want to just get another job as I would be doing the same things and have the same things that bore me or frustrate me just in a different organisation - so I want to set up on my own.
I've given it lots of thought and spoken to others who've done similar, I’ve shared it in much confidence with one or two people I trust and who are potential good contacts – and their advice and supportive comments have been hugely encouraging.
I know the only thing stopping me is the financial risks but if I give myself 12 months then I can work it out properly, get some proper advice and have plans in place. I know it’ll be hard work – but I work damn hard at the moment just for someone else!
By default this will help me with my next resolution – to sort out my finances and stop spending every penny and more that I get in. If I want to work for myself then I have to get much much better at the financial stuff. And I really should start doing things which sound tedious but mature like compare prices and companies for stuff like insurance and phones and gas and boring stuff. (see that’s the wrong attitude I have there already – I should be saying it will be exciting when I realise what I’ve been missing and how much money I can save by switching things – honest!)
I definitely will do at least one charity run – though maybe not a marathon this year; and will continue to not ‘diet’ because I don’t/ cant do that – but keep up a healthier lifestyle. I have clothes that range from size 8-14 in my wardrobe(s) and though I don’t think I’ll ever see a size 8 again I would like to be more towards the smaller end of that range.
That’s just made me think I need to have a clear out. A new year spring clean (in autumn) And stop hoarding stuff and become more organised so I can find things, and, don’t have to have huge clear outs of stuff when I can't shut cupboards or drawers – the garage would be a good starting point – if I tried to park a car in there the only one I could get in would be a toy car. And become more organised generally so I’m not always rushing, late, forgetting to pay bills, or send in dinner money to school etc
Keep up the horse riding – starting again this week as I haven’t been since I hurt my back – and I am very excited as I have found a friend to go riding with who is just as excited about rediscovering horses as I am. So that’s going to be fun. And I would really like to take up guitar playing – I bought one over a year ago intending, as I do, to find a night class to join – and never have. But I'd like to give it a go.
And finally, be a better blogger. Having just discovered the world of blogs a few months ago, I haven’t written as often as I’d like – and also don’t check in regularly enough so I end up missing things on the other blogs I really like and having loads to catch up on.
So, reading this back, the picture I seem to have painted is that in 12 months time I will be sitting on a horse, having just completed a marathon, wearing size 8 jodhpurs, organising a meeting with my bank manager in my diary which presumably will be on the laptop I am using to update my blog while I strum a guitar.. Over ambitious – me?! watch this space!
Tuesday, 25 September 2007
Wednesday, 19 September 2007
Hot Gossip and Hot Dogs
I don't consider myself a bad neighbour... I say hello and comment on the weather when I see people in my street, don’t park in front of anyone’s gates, and am happy to take in parcels if people are out. But as my mother would say I do tend to ‘keep myself to myself’.
On my way to work the other morning, I popped into the village shop and behind me in the queue was someone who lives a couple of doors away - we only know her as the ‘blonde lady’ (she’s got very blonde hair), So I said hello and we exchanged neighbourly pleasantries about the weather ‘cold isn’t it’ ‘like the middle of winter’. Having paid for my paper and mints I left and was about to drive away when the Blonde Lady came out and knocked on my car window.
I opened the window – wondering if I was going to get invited to some neighbourly do and already thinking of excuses as to why I couldn’t go – but she started by saying “I’ve left him you know, I didn’t know whether you’d have heard.” ‘Him’ I took to be the man we nicknamed Mr Overalls (as he’s always wearing decorating overalls – our nicknames for neighbours really don’t stretch the imagination!) who lives - or did do - with Blonde Lady.
“No,” I said, “I didn’t know. Gosh, I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Oh, don’t be,” she says, “it’s the best thing I’ve done, he’s not right – he's not normal”
At this point, I was torn between wanting to know what’s supposedly wrong with Mr Overalls and what constitutes ‘not normal’ in my street – and thinking, noooo, I really don’t want to know the intimate details of the breakdown of a strangers relationship. The latter thought won the day – plus I was late for work, so after asking whether she’s still living in the village (yes she is), off I went.
But it did make me wonder what else am I missing out on in my street, what gossip or goings on - there could be wild parties, wife swapping, or drug fuelled scrabble nights going on right under my nose. hmmm I think its best to keep on ‘keeping myself to myself.’
A couple of days later there was a dog show in the village. Not one where you see pedigree pooches preened and prancing about but a proper village dog show with classes for dogs with things like the ‘waggiest tail’ (won by the spaniel puppy) and ‘saddest eyes’ (the Bassett Hound was pipped at the post by the whippet). So me, Son and the Mutt went - we made some new doggy friends and saw ones we hadn’t seen for ages, and caught up with the news – Daisy the rottweiler is only just back on the streets after breaking her leg and having to stay in for three months, Chelsea the sheltie tore a nail out jumping around last time we were out with her, and the man that doesn't bother putting his dog on a lead even though it fights with all the others hasn’t been seen for a while by anyone. And even though we didn’t enter the Mutt we will next year (he is bound to win the ‘dog that most thinks he’s a human and that cats really like him’ class).
I felt better when I came home, thinking that while I may not know the ins and outs of my neighbours private lives, we do have our doggy friends in the village. So though I may not be a complete local social butterfly I’m not such an unsociable hermit crab as I thought I was.
On my way to work the other morning, I popped into the village shop and behind me in the queue was someone who lives a couple of doors away - we only know her as the ‘blonde lady’ (she’s got very blonde hair), So I said hello and we exchanged neighbourly pleasantries about the weather ‘cold isn’t it’ ‘like the middle of winter’. Having paid for my paper and mints I left and was about to drive away when the Blonde Lady came out and knocked on my car window.
I opened the window – wondering if I was going to get invited to some neighbourly do and already thinking of excuses as to why I couldn’t go – but she started by saying “I’ve left him you know, I didn’t know whether you’d have heard.” ‘Him’ I took to be the man we nicknamed Mr Overalls (as he’s always wearing decorating overalls – our nicknames for neighbours really don’t stretch the imagination!) who lives - or did do - with Blonde Lady.
“No,” I said, “I didn’t know. Gosh, I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Oh, don’t be,” she says, “it’s the best thing I’ve done, he’s not right – he's not normal”
At this point, I was torn between wanting to know what’s supposedly wrong with Mr Overalls and what constitutes ‘not normal’ in my street – and thinking, noooo, I really don’t want to know the intimate details of the breakdown of a strangers relationship. The latter thought won the day – plus I was late for work, so after asking whether she’s still living in the village (yes she is), off I went.
But it did make me wonder what else am I missing out on in my street, what gossip or goings on - there could be wild parties, wife swapping, or drug fuelled scrabble nights going on right under my nose. hmmm I think its best to keep on ‘keeping myself to myself.’
A couple of days later there was a dog show in the village. Not one where you see pedigree pooches preened and prancing about but a proper village dog show with classes for dogs with things like the ‘waggiest tail’ (won by the spaniel puppy) and ‘saddest eyes’ (the Bassett Hound was pipped at the post by the whippet). So me, Son and the Mutt went - we made some new doggy friends and saw ones we hadn’t seen for ages, and caught up with the news – Daisy the rottweiler is only just back on the streets after breaking her leg and having to stay in for three months, Chelsea the sheltie tore a nail out jumping around last time we were out with her, and the man that doesn't bother putting his dog on a lead even though it fights with all the others hasn’t been seen for a while by anyone. And even though we didn’t enter the Mutt we will next year (he is bound to win the ‘dog that most thinks he’s a human and that cats really like him’ class).
I felt better when I came home, thinking that while I may not know the ins and outs of my neighbours private lives, we do have our doggy friends in the village. So though I may not be a complete local social butterfly I’m not such an unsociable hermit crab as I thought I was.
Monday, 10 September 2007
Back to Basics
Although I've been tempted when my sore back isnt so sore to decide Im just being a wuss, its getting better on its own and I dont need to do anything about it, it'll just go away etc etc, I am attempting to be more sensible and take a longer term view. I definitly dont want a recurrence and obviously need it looked at. So on good advice I've signed up with a chiropractor. I have never really thought about what they do before, well you wouldnt really would you unless theres a reason to. But i kind of liked the fact that the one Im going to is looking at it holistically and long term rather than just stop that damn pain for now, so talking and advising on lifestyle, diet, exercise etc (though slightly scary to 'fess up my not too healthy lifestyle to someone in the health profession eg do you drink much water? Maybe a glass or two a day, i mostly drink coffee. How many cups of coffee? probably about 8-10 a day... errr, is that bad?!!).
I think I was also encouraged by the fact that my chiro is young, has big brown eyes, and v soothing antipodean accent as well. It all helps, and is much amusement to my pals who keep making 'jokes' about the fact that i now have to pay a young man to put his hands on me... they'll get bored of it soon! I think I thought it'd be a bit like massage - oh no, no, no, - I have heard things crack and pop very loudly, been pumelled and pushed, and twisted into positions I definitley havent been in for long time. Good news is after an initial bit of ache straight after the sessions, the days following I feel much much better. One of those things that I have no idea how but it seems to work (bit like flying, i have given up trying to work how airplanes stay in the air and just accept it).
I was very disappointed as yesterday I was supposed to do the 10km run for charity, Im trying not to feel too much like a failure and very kindly people who sponsored me are still giving the cash and Im making a donation so at least the charity hasnt lost out. But accept that I do have to learn lessons from this experience and definitley make health and exercise an everyday item and priority so I can look for another one to do in the near future, be well prepared and not need a panic programme to get fit for it.
So its back to basics on the fitness front - 'gentle regular exercise' is advised. I thnk one of the reasons my bad back is making me grumpy, is that I just feel so old. For now jogging, horse riding and doing anything that jars my spine is out according the the chiro (damn shame that sitting at a computer all day or in three hour meetings, doesnt qualify for this, so still have to go to work - but do have to walk around much more and take breaks - which will be novel). Lots of walking and cycling are in (other recommended exercise was gentle workouts at the gym - which i hate - and swimming - which i love doing in the sea or open air pools, but not keen on at the local baths).
So Im taking this to heart and have lengthened the Mutts daily walks, much to his delight, and son who is keen on cycling is also pleased with my new found keenness to get out on our bikes. Usually we stick to lanes and cycle paths but invariably sometimes end up cycling on the road. What a scary experience this can be! When Im in a car and behind or passing a cyclist I always make sure that there is plenty of room and I can go right round them giving a wide berth, and only go past them if theres room to do this (I have a fear and dread that people on bikes will fall off in front of me when Im driving). Hmmm not all drivers seem to think the same way. For this reason Im turning into one of those annoying cyclists that where ever possible uses the footpaths - and tell my son to do this even if I dont - so sorry pedestrians but I have much more sympathy with why people do this now.
I think I was also encouraged by the fact that my chiro is young, has big brown eyes, and v soothing antipodean accent as well. It all helps, and is much amusement to my pals who keep making 'jokes' about the fact that i now have to pay a young man to put his hands on me... they'll get bored of it soon! I think I thought it'd be a bit like massage - oh no, no, no, - I have heard things crack and pop very loudly, been pumelled and pushed, and twisted into positions I definitley havent been in for long time. Good news is after an initial bit of ache straight after the sessions, the days following I feel much much better. One of those things that I have no idea how but it seems to work (bit like flying, i have given up trying to work how airplanes stay in the air and just accept it).
I was very disappointed as yesterday I was supposed to do the 10km run for charity, Im trying not to feel too much like a failure and very kindly people who sponsored me are still giving the cash and Im making a donation so at least the charity hasnt lost out. But accept that I do have to learn lessons from this experience and definitley make health and exercise an everyday item and priority so I can look for another one to do in the near future, be well prepared and not need a panic programme to get fit for it.
So its back to basics on the fitness front - 'gentle regular exercise' is advised. I thnk one of the reasons my bad back is making me grumpy, is that I just feel so old. For now jogging, horse riding and doing anything that jars my spine is out according the the chiro (damn shame that sitting at a computer all day or in three hour meetings, doesnt qualify for this, so still have to go to work - but do have to walk around much more and take breaks - which will be novel). Lots of walking and cycling are in (other recommended exercise was gentle workouts at the gym - which i hate - and swimming - which i love doing in the sea or open air pools, but not keen on at the local baths).
So Im taking this to heart and have lengthened the Mutts daily walks, much to his delight, and son who is keen on cycling is also pleased with my new found keenness to get out on our bikes. Usually we stick to lanes and cycle paths but invariably sometimes end up cycling on the road. What a scary experience this can be! When Im in a car and behind or passing a cyclist I always make sure that there is plenty of room and I can go right round them giving a wide berth, and only go past them if theres room to do this (I have a fear and dread that people on bikes will fall off in front of me when Im driving). Hmmm not all drivers seem to think the same way. For this reason Im turning into one of those annoying cyclists that where ever possible uses the footpaths - and tell my son to do this even if I dont - so sorry pedestrians but I have much more sympathy with why people do this now.
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